olga is going to hell

there are just those times when i wish i could be swallowed up by the ground. -looks up at ceiling- why oh why do i do these things that put me in these situations. anyway the bright side of the day was that i purchased a red swishy skirt to twirl around in at work.

olga's theme song of the day: my stupid mouth [john mayer]

little mister cheesy casanovas

okay explain to this to me guys cos god only knows how your neurons connect in your brains...

how does....

" HOUSEMATE WANTED, i'm a 21yr old female who is looking for a housemate to fill spare bedroom. 3 bedroom house, (insert random suburb), rent (insert random monetary figure). call (insert random house phone number) or mobile on (insert random mobile phone number)."

translate to...

"SINGLE FEMALE, COME GET ME BOYS. i'm a 21 yr old female who is looking for a date if you think i am that desperate to be advertising for one in a housemate wanted advertisment. 3 bedroom house so there is plenty of room to stretch. call me on (insert random house phone number) or mobile on (insert random mobile phone number)"

don't laugh cos it does happened, and to some poor girls it has happened.
oh what has men stooped to these days??
what happened to the good old days of men saying "marry me" to mean "i love you, you're rich and i need that money you're about to inherit to live a life of luxury beyond my means". bring back the top hats and carvats

p.s zelda...how about the gym or some other coordinated group fitness class (tae-bo??) on tues??

orange yellow and sunshine....

greetings helga and olga's mass following [i say mass cause i don't know how many... lost count] and my fellow vikers! this is once again my attempt to make a splash of colour.... note to everyone- by now u should all realise the orange blogs have no meaning...aren't deep and don't really enlighten u on anything... UNTIL NOW... f.y.i for all u that missed that... i just "enlightened" u to the uselessness of orange blogs!
anyways.... i have just completed a week of waking up early... which is an achievement for me!!!! have been in the city by 8:45-9:30... sometimes even if i don't actually start til 11am... crazy i know!!! my i'm teaching my body to wake up earlier... for what reason i'm unsure of at the moment... but i'm sure it's a good one. anyways a side effect of this operation of mine is the fact that i've walked around like zombie cause i can't stay awake anymore by 3pm... i find myself falling asleep in the middle of a WORD... no longer do i forget to finish sentences... its WORDS now... lecture notes are full of half written words followed by squiggles... so u can take it from me... that's bad... don't attempt to do this if u don't already wake up early...
oh and always keep walkable shoes next to the door... thus when u run out of the house at least u can put something good on ur feet... unlike me this morning... i learnt this lesson the hard way... am going to be clomping around uni in HEELS... bloody hell... of all things to chuck my feet into... its heels... am going to be a slow turtle today...
that's 3 lessons this blog... how record-breaking! YA-YA!

"ain't no feeling like being free"

so sang the three ladies that exude independence. destiny's child, for those of you who didn't pick that one up. and the song of which is olga's theme song of the day. "free" by the aforementioned ladies. the ultimate song for when you're feeling like crap.

anyway...on to...the mystery of life. i would attempt to make some deep comments about this...but really it's just a few of my random thoughts that have passed through the foggy haze in the past week or so. life is just that. it doesn't stop for anything. same goes for reality. it is rarely fair. and i guess the key to solving the mystery of life is to accept it as it is. that old cliche "life is too short"...is well justified. it's too short to dwell on the things that you've lost, or the things that don't work out...or most importantly...it's too short to spend most of it living in the past.

hah. easier said that done and i freely admit that. so olga's moral of the story is...well there really isn't a moral. make what you want of this pointless post. life is what you make it. oh before i forget... i promised i would write something about how life IS wonderful. because it is. it is a collection of moments that are rich in colour, warmth, love, laughter and all those feelgood things. if we had more of those moments...the not so pleasant ones would fade into the background as hazy memories.

wind chimes

after having had another decidedly shitty day...i decided to make a purchase of some red hot underwear. this certainly made my day much better.

olga's theme song for the day is "split screen sadness" by john mayer. this is getting depressing. for the sake of this blog i'm going to start listening to happier or angrier music.

little miss spooked

okay i do have to admit that the tone of this blog has somewhat gotten slightly depressing lately and there seems to be a lack of sarcasm coming from us, and whilst it is totally justified (well to our crazy minds it is) and there is a reason to the madness, i being PERKY will be posting a yet again rambling post which hopefully is PERKY.

spook humor:

there's 3 men in a club
spook 1: "harry do you know james"
spook 2: "well yes from the tape recordings"

funny? i shall think so.

and where does that lead us? my intriguing, probing your mind, thinking outside the square, fully sik question. what is the sexist occupation someone can have? i swear those british spies are so drool-able. mysterious and a british accent...what more could i ask for? well that and the hidden identity of a 3 star michellin chef.

in tone with songs of the day i've learnt something pretty important to me.
there's 525,600 minutes in a year
there's 525,600 journeys to plan
and there's 525,600 opportunities awaiting us.

let's celebrate. peace out dudes.
p.s i've fallen in love with the vinyl poster boy.

"you're fine as you are..."

surprisingly, a male friend of mine said this to me after i explained operation c-cup to him. he must have been the first out of many to say that. i would take stuff like that as motivation over measurements and fitness suggestions anyday. well i AM a girl.

for mr anonymous and the rest...please don't take away my feeling of success...no matter how small. don't assume that i want to know the specifics of weight loss and boob reduction. just as i would not want to assume that you are an asshole who has no social etiquette whatsoever. although i appreciate you read our somewhat insane ramblings...and the opinions you choose to leave...i don't want to hear the fitness talk...i studied it after all.

since i don't want to end on an unpleasant note...the sun was shining brightly and cheerfully today and i was trying to think of that "bright and sunshiney day" song...which i still can't remember...so today's song will be "you gotta be" by des'ree.

little miss revelations

WE NEED MORE CHICKS. no. not chickens.

sing, sing, sing

it's ok...i still have a little bit of faith in the male population. i am not angry. i am not going through anti-man rage (maybe just a little bit). i am just...over it. i love my guy friends dearly (as mates obviously)...but lift my spirits a bit and show me this awesomeness that is supposed to exist in men.

i have recently discovered that we go about our days with a theme song for whatever mood we are in. and we associate particular songs with the people in our lives. or am i the only insane one that does this sort of thing?

so we begin...today's song of the day is..."dry your eyes" by the streets. i know it's a pretty pathetic effort seeing as it's such a beautiful day outside...but ON TO THE NEXT BABY!

operation C-cup update: i lost a kilo!!!

tick tock

the little faith i have in the male population has further diminished.

little miss french knickers

i have them on and there are a few things to say about them..

1. they are uber nice
2. they are surprisingly uber comfortable
3. they uber don't leave much to the imagination

the dawn of the lingerie age is back
out with underwear!
in with lingerie!

side note: i received the knickers as a b'day gift in case anyone's wondering why on god's earth i have all of a sudden decided to talk about my wardrobe of lingerie. that and i know who the majority of our readers are and how they think.

thanks all for coming to celebrate the day that the world discovered MOI! what more could we want for with great food, great people, great waiter, and great presents. and thanks to Olga in reminding us just why mini's should not be worn in winter...she had hairy legs.

p.s happy belated b'day to phil who turned 22 (??) on the 10th of july
p.p.s tom is a _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ / (space in case no one knows what that means) _ _ _ _

how to...

...tactfully decline requests from mates for a ride home...and to deter them from ever asking you again

• that magical, often elusive word..."NO"
• answer a question with a question..."but why?"
• tell the truth...their house is located in the opposite direction of travel (which it often is)
• a favourite..."i only give lifts to people living within 100m of me"
• reply with an outrageously false story about how you have to pick up your boyfriend from an extended trip to ghana
• palm them off to your unsuspecting friends who also drive
• reel off a list of conditions...petrol money, no talking in the car, no changing the radio station, must sit in your underwear...anything that comes to mind
• do it once...during which you drive at barely legal speed limits and manage bad driving techniques (ie. taking sharp corners at higher speeds)

please, for all our sakes...DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS MADNESS. people with their driver's licence are not taxi drivers. we are your mates who sometimes cave under the pressure of being put on the spot...and worst of all have to pay for our bloody petrol at 117c per litre.

don't abuse the friendship obligation.

i just realised that this sounds like something out of an advertisement. it should be.

little miss angry

riddle me this fellas...

guy goes on extended trip away from beloved girlfriend
guy does not communicate with beloved girlfriend whilst on extended trip
guy comes back from extended trip
guy STILL does not communicate with beloved girlfriend once back from extended trip

beloved girlfriend not happy
beloved girlfriend bit angry
beloved girlfriend send angry, angry SMS's

questions:
1. has the guy done anything wrong?
2. what is a realistic timeframe till guy should have communicated with beloved girlfriend?

Mines more important!

It was my birthday too!! and my 21st at that so i'll cry if i want to!...u people probably dont really know me since helga and olga dominate the vikers...but i am frida...the long lost frida! so happy birthday helga...but this year is year of the frida =p *only kidding* you can have one day =)
ahh isnt this blue refreshing to the eye?

little miss floozy

i'm into you and i want you now...
so come get me boys!

is the colour of my designated posts an omen to my traffic light? let's all ponder about that for a while..

oh and..
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO GORGEOUS, STRIKINGLY BEAUTIFUL, ME
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME"

long live the age of the sassy 20's.

she's just not that into you

gees, i hope i don't get smacked with a copyright accusation. anyway, after reading the book "he's just not that into you" i was inspired to write something for the opposite sex. given that males and females have no communication whatsoever on the best of days, hopefully this gives our male readers an insight into a female mind.

so here goes...boys, she's just not that into you if...

• she jumps the fence and railway tracks at a train station just to avoid you
• she says she has a boyfriend (9 times out of 10, she won't)
• she gets one of her friends to be her pretend lesbian girlfriend
• she allows you to pay for everything...and if you've been sucked in bad...you will.
• she buys you something pink.

apparantly, according to many male friends, the female creature is smart enough and evil enough to constantly send out mixed messages to these poor unsuspecting males. that's utter BS. for one, why would we spend that much time and effort doing something like that? please deal with us exactly how you like to be dealt with...upfront and straightforward. short of saying "i'm into you and i want you now", don't take anything else as truth.

this babble probably makes no sense whatsoever. i will have to mull over it more. i've just realised i've contradicted myself a million times over in this single post...so please forgive me. we females are complex creatures. it's not all about beer and sex for us.

it's my birthday

and i'll cry if i want too.

we apparently need more fun-ness in our blog so any suggestions??
so far we've tried:

• wit (only to be told it confused you guys)
• sense of humor (only to be told we don't have any)
• life lessons (only to be told that one is a cold hearted B***H and the other is a floozy)
• male auction (only to be told there was no interest in males)
• ANTI-MEN raging vents (only to get weird looks)
• wisdom from our brilliant deep minds (only to be scoffed at)
• malicious content (only to be berated at)

seems so far the only thing that has caught ppl's attention spans longer than the normal 5 seconds to scan through our posts is the pornographic pictures (yes they are real btw and there's been many a compliments about them -thanks dottie!-).

have we hit the height of our ingenious capacity? is this the peak from us? where do we go now from those *pictures*?? i want our ZING back.

mopetown

i've reached the lowest of lows. i'm moping about the house...and my parents have a more extensive social life than i do. how utterly smashing. anyway i thought i'd make a little contribution since there are no other vikers to be found around here.

i am slowly coming to the realisation that operation c-cup is just that tiny bit impossible. oh well...another thing to mope about. maybe i should go run off my mopiness at the gym.

olga's thought for the day: it is nice to know that one has abs.

girl power

"you might also want to consider why people look at your breasts so much. maybe they just don't want to look at your face."
- anonymous

and here's my response then.



and there you go. a simple answer and response statement. i have no idea what i am actually talking about. all i know is that i had a right old laugh cos amu got dumped. and she was the one feeling guilty in the first place. good stuff.

go edinburgh! i'll see you there travis. don't forget to bring my hat along.