boom crash opera
following on from helga's philosophical take on our blog...i thought i'd give it a go. maybe i might get a comment here or there (and take out philosophical queen status). so my question for tonight is...
"is getting along with someone really enough?"
the obvious implication to this question would be when you are in a relationship. but this is also about friendship as well. too many times when we are asked why we like someone or why we are with someone, the common answer is..."we get along well". of course, that cannot be the sole reason. or can it?
throw all that jazz in about physical attraction and emotional attachment into the mix and you've got quite a brew there. maybe it's too hard to single out what it is you like about a person, and so being able to get along well with them becomes a main focal point. we all know (well, some of us do anyway) that getting along with someone has many dimensions.
there's the people that you can crap on about everything under the sun to. there's the ones who you can have some decent conversations with when you see them every so often. and then...wait for it...there are those people who come into your life and never really leave. the ones who you undeniably click with. that click can be anything from spending 7 hours in the car together and talking non-stop...to picking up your conversation from where you left off....no matter how long it's been since you'd seen that person. it's the combination of trust, self-disclosure and at it's most basic level...it is the unwavering friendship that exists and allows people to get along well...regardless of whether you are going to date the person or be friends with them.
a wise soul (actually it was just one of the girls at work) told me that relationships that last the longest are often the ones based on friendship. interesting point. but it all ties into the theory that getting along with someone involves much more than being able to talk to them.
"is getting along with someone really enough?"
the obvious implication to this question would be when you are in a relationship. but this is also about friendship as well. too many times when we are asked why we like someone or why we are with someone, the common answer is..."we get along well". of course, that cannot be the sole reason. or can it?
throw all that jazz in about physical attraction and emotional attachment into the mix and you've got quite a brew there. maybe it's too hard to single out what it is you like about a person, and so being able to get along well with them becomes a main focal point. we all know (well, some of us do anyway) that getting along with someone has many dimensions.
there's the people that you can crap on about everything under the sun to. there's the ones who you can have some decent conversations with when you see them every so often. and then...wait for it...there are those people who come into your life and never really leave. the ones who you undeniably click with. that click can be anything from spending 7 hours in the car together and talking non-stop...to picking up your conversation from where you left off....no matter how long it's been since you'd seen that person. it's the combination of trust, self-disclosure and at it's most basic level...it is the unwavering friendship that exists and allows people to get along well...regardless of whether you are going to date the person or be friends with them.
a wise soul (actually it was just one of the girls at work) told me that relationships that last the longest are often the ones based on friendship. interesting point. but it all ties into the theory that getting along with someone involves much more than being able to talk to them.
posted by viking_mistresses at 11:19 PM
2 Comments:
Maybe you're looking at it the wrong way. Maybe the reason why you get along with people is because of the physical attraction, emotional attachment, etc. not just because.
I would argue that its hard to 'get along' with someone if you aren't able to relate to what they do/say on some emotional kind of level.
To me the main factors in friendships are chance and need.
You might be in a state where you need someone to talk to you, and you just so happen to meet someone who is in the need to hear about someone else. And bang, you have a friendship (or at least an interesteng conversation).
Personally I'm testing a theory of mine. It's my theory that we don't meet new 'friends' (ie ppl that will become our friends) not because they arent out there, but because we aren't open to them. So I'm trying to be more open and trusting, and see if I meet more 'friends'. I'll let you know in a few months how it goes.
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